I hope all of you are well! How do you feel about raising kids in poverty? I want to share my point of view and hopefully hear from you all!!
As a woman born into a struggling, single parent house I can relate to the many issues that come with poverty. My parent, due to a disability has been on fixed income and will most likely remain there if not for some sort of miracle. My sibling and I were always provided with the basics though the household tended to be full of turmoil. I never understood how people who are already have struggle, choose to have kids like that would make life an easier.
I get it, shit happens! But is there not a thing called responsibility? I understand that many folks hold deep desires to raise children and all of that. I just don’t see the purpose in having them knowing you can’t really enjoy them or provide them With a half way decent life.
Life can get better! But is it not a better idea to be a better established individual prepared for anything that may happen, able to set up funds for them to have a fighting chance, show them the world or at least something other than their backyard, provide them an adequate education and healthcare, an over all good life? That us what I strive for. I also want to take the time to find a man that will be the father of my children and not just the “baby daddy” or worse “that nigga who ain’t do shit yet.”
Many folks, especially blacks, have kids with less progressive folks and wonder why we haven’t quite faired like we would’ve liked to. I believe in black love and black babies. However, I also believe that if we are not smarter and continue settling for less, we deserve to live in ghettos struggling. If you keep doin what you’ve always done, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always got. We have do want better and do better. Even more important we have to want to do better!
Thanks For Reading,
A. The Blogger
I’m sure this topic will be highly relatable. This topic has no racial barriers. “Bad mothers” are not uncommon in society and tend to be at the root of many mentally unstable individuals.
To me, having kids should be an enriching experience! As far as I am concerned people should have kids when they at a point in life to be able to provide ALL of the essential needs. I never understood how women could get pregnant, have a baby knowing she was not prepared, struggle to raise it and as a result have become bitter in the process. Speaking from experience, I had a disabled mother who could never be satisfied. Took her frustrations out on her kids and attempted to hinder our lives and burden us with her constant bad decisions. My idea always was this. If you know that you are either too sick or to unprepared to have kids, why have them when there is no guarantee that things will be fine especially given your situation? I had to finally step back and allow her to pay the consequences of her own action as a young person. As I told her “you have been this way since before I got here and you you be this way when I leave. I’ve done my best however I will NOT accept your mistreatment for your mistakes.”
Up until a few years ago I allowed her to bring me down. I truly believe her purpose for having us was to have individuals who would assist you forever. I have no problem helping anyway especially my mother, however, I also have a life to live. I used to think the reason she shot my dreams and ambitions out if the sky because she was afraid for me instead it was simply because that did not fit HER plan. I know my situation is unique but many have mothers who abuse them in one way or another, especially those of us born into the struggle.
As an adult I see many struggling mothers taking their frustrations out on their kids wether younger or older. It’s sad because this world of full of rotten people and the one person you should have in your corner is your mother. Not a mother calling you hateful things or hitting you. Not a mother who would allow anyone else to hurt you. I mean after all she is the one who made the conscious decision to bring you into this world. Having have dealt with a bitter and hateful mother, I can see how someone could become a mean person. When you strive to to the best you can and she created this whole big mess in the first place is quite the burden. With mothers like these who needs enemies. I have come to realize that her burdens and misery is not my burdens and misery. I have to live for me. It’s not fair to be confined to your mothers house when you don’t live peacefully together no matter what the circumstance is if she says you are the source of her misfortune or worthless, etc. no one is worth being miserable for, not even a mother. Mother who truly love you think before they call you something nasty or raise a hand to you or a minor issue. Mothers are generally supposed to be the one you turn to not the one who burn you. And those of you who went through it or are still going through it just keep in mind that as long as you know you have done your best you will be fine. Stay ambitious and focus on success because you success is the best revenge!
Thanks For Reading,